"Have you ever wanted a Comp Werkes Fender Eliminator, but been put off by the high price, or limited availability? Or do you own one, and had your sensibilities offended by it's absurdly high weight? Have I got the solution for you!"

"I submit, for your entertainment, the newest product offering from Big Dick Technologies, the Hawk Fender Replacer, so named as not to be confused with CW's inferior stainless steel (cough, spit) product. Utilizing space age light weight all aluminum construction, with all aluminum fasteners, our team of engineers has undercut the weight of our competition by a country mile. Is mile a good measure of weight? Anyway, I'm holding a CW assembly in my hand, and it feels, well, like a brick. And the BD Fender Replacer, feels, well, about as heavy as one thin sheet of ordinary paper.

I haven't weighed them yet, since I'm not a drug dealer, I don't have superfine scales as home, but since I do deal drugs for a living (just kidding!), I have access to superfine scales at work, and I do promise a gram for gram shootout within the next several days. I also haven't done any of the marketing type of work, like taking pictures and putting them on a website, but I'll try to get that done this weekend. "bigdick.com" might be available, but I don't want people getting into trouble at work, so I'll have to think of something else. As far as what it looks like, it looks just like what's on my bike at Beatty's site, http://www.hawkland.de/beatty/ , go to photo's, bottom of page two.